DIVORCE

Broken families are on since the beginning of humanity. In fact, divorce, which
has been very common in today’s societies, is the major cause that leads to family
devastation. However, although, in some cases, divorce is the only solution for a family
to live in peace, one must think many times before taking such decision, and that is
because of many . When life becomes unbearable between a women an her husband,
they may think of divorce as being a fair solution for both of them to get their
“independence” and live a normal life, they may even think that it is suitable for their
children. However, this is not the case , divorce may have some serious consequences
that can affect the whole society . As declared before, divorce must remain the last
decision to take by a couple, because of its dreadful consequences on the whole
family. Women, for instance, undergo enormous pain as a result of divorce. In most
cases, law gives divorced women custody. Consequently, they find themselves alone
with their children, and hence obliged to look after them in a society where divorced
women may be looked in a bad way. Besides, most of divorced women don’t have
regular income, as they were financially depending on their husbands before divorce,
so they have to work outside home, without neglecting their duties toward their
children, and this is very difficult to accomplish especially with the sexual harassment
that becomes very common. Emotionally speaking, a divorced woman feels as she
was betrayed by her ex-husband .She may also start to hate all men, and this can
have direct effects on the way she rises her children. It is believed that men are the
least affected by divorce. However this doesn’t mean that they do not suffer at all.
Indeed, men suffer financially from divorce; they are obliged to support their children
as well as their ex-wives. And because before divorce the responsibility was shared
by both husband and wife.
The memories of divorce have never been more sorrowful to any age group than the
children of divorced parents. Although a couple’s marriage vows usually include the
phrase “till death do us part,” about half of all marriages end up in divorce (“Divorce”).
The reasons for divorce could be very simple as well as they could be complex. Some
reasons for divorce are adultery, simple arrogance, dishonesty, insecurity, domestic
and sexual abuses. In some situation divorce may provide relief from the strain of a
loveless or abusive relationship form divorcing couples (“Divorce”). Divorce remains
an apparent solution to the existing problems for the concerned parties, however it can
leaves a vacuum, challenges, and sometimes uncertainties in the lives of most
divorced couples and children they may have .The challenges which come with
divorce may hardly be measured with any degree of accuracy. For example, the
sacrifices, pains, and sufferings of various forms resulting from divorce, can be easily
listed. However, their intensity on the divorced person may be hard to measure. More
so, it is difficult to estimate the damage divorce inflicts on the emotions of the divorced
person. One thing that appears very important to one person may just be insignificant
to another person. Divorce is always a dreadful experience in a persons life, especially
a child. When parents divorce, children are not always acknowledged during the
termination and settlement process. This oversight can lead to problems with the
child’s perception of day to day life. The impact divorce has on a family is far more
noticeable to the children of the family than to the parents. As a child, there are many
circumstances or situations that affect a view, opinion, attitude, and/or memory.
Children have many daily struggles of their own to cope with, such as peer pressure
and learning exactly who they are. Adults and parents sometimes forget what it is like
to be a child dealing with some of the childhood pressures that children face, especially
in today’s society. Many parents do not realize how something like divorce could
possibly affect their children as much as it does them. In any case, most children are
strongly affected by divorce. Some react and handle the situation differently than
others, but all experience some kind of emotional change. can cause many different
emotions to arise that children may be unfamiliar with, and those behaviors may cause
some behavioral changes. Feeling angry and sad are some common feelings of
children dealing with divorce. Children have a hard time comprehending why their
mother and father are arguing and cannot figure out why they are deciding to separate.
The family needs to try their best to explain to the child why they are separating, while
comforting the child as much as possible .The fighting that occurs between parents
can cause children to react negatively and they can begin to show aggression towards
others. Children can also begin to act up in class and become defiant towards
authority, which usually results in their grades dropping. Often children have difficulties
learning to cope with their feelings and feel like they are on an emotional rollercoaster
.They’re also often stuck between a battle zone and as result can suffer psychological
problems. Feelings of hopelessness may take over for many kids because they have
no control or input to what is going on in their lives. Divorce itself is inevitably an
unpleasant situation, but it has been seen that children with siblings tend to cope better
than any single child household in most instances, especially in cases where
thoughtless parents take the unpleasant route of trying to ‘split up’ the children in an
effort to hurt the other party. Effectively, children with siblings develop best with the
divorce, single children trailing behind, with split siblings ultimately taking the worst
mental beating out of the lot. The reasons for this may not at first be obvious, but let
us take a moment to review the family dynamic itself and just what divorce does to the
relationship of siblings .A once intact family is effectively torn in two with the legal
action of divorce, children are torn in their views in loving both mother and father, and
ultimately they mourn for what is almost literally the death of the family dynamic itself.
It is no longer the ‘normal’ life of mother, father, and children, but now a complicated
life split between the children and their parents, possibly further complicated by a step
family or the constant tension between mother and father.In this situation a sibling
becomes a sort of buffer zone, an emotional barrier between the pain and loss of the
divorce and a happy family life. The sibling represents something concrete, a brother
or sister that will (or should) remain. An individual who shares in the same pain and
can be used as a more than viable coping mechanism, perhaps one of the only truly
healthy coping outlets available to a child going through the divorce process.
Sa Buhay natin may mga desisyon tayo na di natin alam kung makakabuti ba talaga
o makakasama minsan go na lang tayo ng go sa isang bagay ng di natin iniisip yung
magiging consequences napasaya lang tayo parang yun na lang yung last ng buhay
natin , di na rin natin iniisip yung mga susunod ganon din pag malungkot gusto na
lang natin matapos pero tulang ng isang tao ang mag asawa , may sakripisyo
maraming problema pero madalas masaya , kung sa isang relaayon ay papasok ka
dapat sigurado ka na tanggap mo na yung mga katangian nya , alam mo yung respeto
at kung hanggang san yung limitasyon mo ,Ang pag aasawa ay di tulad ng pag
boboyfriend girlfriend dahil ito ay mas sagrado nangako kayo sa Diyos at kung sa
usapang practical ay masyado nyong pinahihirapan ang sarili nyo bakit pa kailangan
magpakasal at gumastos ng mahal kung magkakasawaan at mag iiwanan lang naman
? pano yung mga maiiwan Divorce pa kung pwede namang ayusin pero bakit
kailanhan magpakasal kung in the first place alam nyo na yung kahahatungan o bakit
kailangan maghiwalay kung simpleng away dahil sa third party or di marunong
makuntento , Minsan naiisip ba nila yung mga pinagagawa nila ? yubg mga
nagdedevorce ng ganon ganon na lang. God created Man and Woman to serve and
follow what he want to us to do di para magkasakitan at mag iwanan , love is always
there inside your heart but trust never be. Wedding is for God ,Divorce is nothing.