When I arrived at the airport in Jakarta in October 1994, I was met by a driver dispatched by Indosiar, the company that

I had come to work for, and by a young, short Indonesian who I had gotten to know by exchanging messages on the internet. He seemed pretty ordinary to me then, but over the next 17 years I learned that he was far from it. For some reason, Amrullah liked me, and I liked him. But as a foreigner visiting the country for the first time, I didn't know anything about Indonesians and I was cautious not to get to be close friends too soon. But Amrul had other ideas. He began to introduce me to a brand new world I had never known before. He introduced me to Indonesian culture, beautiful Indonesian scenery, and Indonesian people. Without Am, I might have spent most of my weekends in the hotel room where I was living. But Am took me out. In the year I worked in Jakarta, we saw Java, Bali, Lombok. I stood on the edge of a volcano for the first time and saw the beautiful sunrise as it rose behind the steaming caldera. Through a snorkel mask I saw a coral reef with inhabitants of stunning color and form. I saw a tea plantation. I saw batik being made. I saw surf crashing against jagged rocks below tall cliffs. I looked west across the sea from Lombok and saw the towering Gunung Agung on Bali silhouetted against the beautiful sunsets. Before that day in October of 1994, I knew next to nothing about Indonesia. I knew a little bit about Bali. I recognized the name Jakarta as the capital. The name Sukarno rang a bell. But I could not have told you where Indonesia was, exactly. After I was offered the job in Jakarta, I started reading and I started asking questions on the internet. And one of those who answered was Amrullah. That day my life changed forever. I experienced new beauty and color and music and clothing and food, most of which I liked, some of which I didn't. And I learned to appreciate a religion of which I had been almost totally ignorant. But most important I met the ordinary people of Indonesia. They were not only friendly, but many were kind and generous to a fault. And among the best ones were the members of Amrul's family, and his close friends. They accepted me from the very beginning and showed me a love that equaled the love of my own family. And they showed me how all families should be: always there to help each other. Even what an American would call a distant cousin is there to help when needed. And Am's family treated me just as they did their real relatives, with kindness and generosity, in ways that it is difficult to describe, and even more difficult to count. Am gave me a new family and a new life. On the other side of the Pacific my family accepted Am just as quickly as his accepted me. Because Am was smart, friendly and out-going, a very hard person not to like. He lit up the life of everyone he touched. Whether it was his family, fellow students, or co-workers in Indonesia or those same groups in America, they all loved Am because he genuinely loved them. Maybe we were allowed to share only a part of our lives with Am because we just didn't deserve any more. What we got was more than anyone should expect. What I got was a real life with someone who showed me what is really important. Am may be gone, but what he has given me is still herehis love, his family, his smile. They will last as long as those of us who knew him. Thank you, Am. Cinta kamu.