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According to oxford English Dictionary, identity means The sameness of a person or thing at all times or in all circumstances; the condition or fact that a person or thing is itself and not something else; individuality, personality. This definition explains that identity is an achievement of being who we are, depending on facts and conditions that we experienced throughout our life. In the analyzing of Erick Eriksons theory of identity development, Muuss (1996) states: identity achievement implies that individual assesses strengths and weaknesses and determines how he or she wants to deal with them identity is not readily given to an individual by society Identity must be acquired through sustained individual effort.(p.51). I support Muuss statement because as an individual I think that I am in a stage of achieving my identity through knowing and dealing with my strengths and weaknesses. The environment where I live did not give me any identity, but it helps me to answer some questions such as who I am, Where did I come from?, and what do I want to become?. In Nisas Marriage, there are many facts that prove Muuss statement. At the beginning of the story, Nisa was a child who did not achieve yet her identity. But throughout the events, she faced many obstacles that helped her to know her weaknesses and strengths. She was forced by her parents to get married even though she expressed her refusal. She escaped from her village in order to express her disagreement, but unfortunately she was caught each time. She could not convince her parents to cancel the marriage. She thought that she was too young to get married. She did not have experience with men. She looked to her future husband as a stranger because she did not love him even if he was handsome. This is an example of social factors that contributes to Nisas identity development. When she got married, she refused to leave her parents village. She did not want to assume her new status of being a wife because she was still a child. But after she had been living

with her husband for a long time, she started to love him. She finally accepted having sexual relations with her husband although the first time he hurter her. She personally made efforts to try to reach a mature identity by accepting her new life. According to Shostak (1981), Nisa states at the end of the chapter: We lived on and I loved him and he loved me. I loved him the way a young adult knows how to love, I just loved him. Whenever he went away and I stayed behind, Id miss him. (p.166). This sentence shows that Nisa had finally reached a mature and feminine identity. In boys and girls written by Alice Munro, there are also facts that prove Muuss statement. Munro begins her story as a girl that struggles against societys ideas of how a girl should be behave. Munro was nine years old at the beginning of story. She liked to help her father who was a fox farmer in difficult tasks. Munro did not like to share her mothers work because she believed that feminine tasks are unchallenging. Munro did not like to wash clothes or prepare the dinner nor have relations with boyfriends. In fact, she preferred to work with her father. She wanted to do mens skills to prove that women are not less strong than men. Throughout the story, she faced comments that she didnt like, especially from her grandmother who gave her moral lessons by commenting on Munros behavior: Girls dont slam doors like that. Girls keep their knees together when they sit down. (Munro, 1968, p.3). The worst was when she would ask a question and the grandmother would reply Thats none of a girls business. (Munro, 1968, p.3). These comments are social factors that contribute to her identity development. By that time, things began to change. Munro was eleven years old when farmers were buying tractors. Munros family had two old horses Mack and Flora. They had to slaughter them

because they became no longer useful. When Munro was present at the moment of slaughtering Mack, she felt painful and uncomfortable My legs were a little shaky and I jumped gratefully down into the hay (Munro, 1968, p.4). On the other hand, Henry, who was the slaughter, liked the moment and started laughing when the horse was dying. At that time, Munro understood that there is a difference between men and women. She changed her way of dressing, and began to take care of her hair. She started to worry more about how she should dress. At the end of the story, Laird told his father how her sister behaved when Mack was slaughtered. The father responded Never mind, shes only a girl. (Munro, 1968, p.5), Munro did not protest and thought that maybe it was true. This statement shows that Munro had finally reached a mature identity. She understood that women have different skills that they cannot share with man, and vice versa. Achieving an identity is a very difficult skill that a human being must realize. Society does not give any identity, but it is only a way to complete it. Nisa and Munro have proved it through their story. We have to take their example because if we dont achieve our identity, there will be no difference between a human being and an animal.

References

Munro, A. (1968). Alice Munro's "Boys and Girls": A Study Guide from Gale's "Short Stories for Students" (Volume 05, Chapter 4). Muuss, Rolf E.(1996). Erick Eriksons theory of identity development in theories of adolescence. New York. MacGraw-Hill. Shostak, M. (1981). Nisa: The life and words of a !Kung woman. Cambridge: Harvard University Press.