BREAVEMENT AND GRIEF COUNSELLING

Bereavement literally means the state of being deprived of someone by death and refers to being in the state of mourning. Grief is the subjective feeling precipitated by the death of a loved one. Mourning -the societal expression of grief; the process by which grief is resolved. Grief counselling is a form of psychotherapy that aims to help people cope with grief and mourning following the death of loved ones, or with major life changes that trigger feelings of grief (e.g., divorce). Grief therapy is a kind of psychotherapy used to treat severe or complicated traumatic grief reactions, which are usually brought on by the loss of a close person (by separation or death) or by community disaster. The goal of grief therapy is to identify and solve the psychological and emotional problems which appeared as a consequence. Types of bereavement      Childhood Bereavement Death of a child Death of a spouse Death of a parent Death of a sibling Other losses FIVE STAGES OF GRIEF (Kubler Ross,1969) 1. Shock/denial (No. it can t be true) 2. Anger (why is this happening to me?) 3. Bargaining (I promise I ll be better person if .) 4. Depression (I don t care any more) 5. Acceptance (I m ready for whatever comes)

All individuals do not experience each of these changes in response to a loss, nor do they necessarily experience them in this order. Some individuals grieving behaviors may fluctuate, and even overlap b/w stages.  What is normal grief? This is a term used to describe the typical symptoms somebody experiences after bereavement.  Anticipatory Grief  Pathological(Abnormal) grief Grief therapy Grief therapy is a kind of psychotherapy used to treat severe or complicated traumatic grief reactions, which are usually brought on by the loss of a close person (by separation or death) or by community disaster. The goal of grief therapy is to identify and solve the psychological and emotional problems which appeared as a consequence. They may appear as behavioural or physical changes, psychosomatic disturbances, delayed or extreme mourning, conflictual problems or sudden and unexpected mourning. Grief therapy may be available as individual or group therapy. A common area where grief therapy has been extensively applied is with the parents of cancer patients. Models of grief therapy 1) Four tasks of mourning (J.William Wordens,1991) 2) Meaning Reconstruction (Robert Neimeyers,1998 ) Tasks of mourning 1. To Accept the Reality of the Loss On one level, this isstraightforward: the facts of the loss need to be recognized. 2. To Work Through the Pain of the Grief

First, grieving persons may actively seek to avoid painful feelings and thoughts. The therapist s role is to both sit with the person s painful feelings and to help him or her express these. 3. To Adjust to an Environment in Which the Deceased is Missing A deceased person has often played many roles in the survivor s life. In some cases, the survivor s self-definition has depended heavily on his or her relationship with the deceased person. In such cases it is often helpful to engage the survivor in an active process of selfperception. Group therapy is an especially powerful venue toward this end. 4. To Emotionally Relocate the Deceased & Move on with Life In therapy, it is often more useful to facilitate the grieving person s recognition that the lost person is never really forgotten and in that sense that the grieving process never ends.  Strengths y It places a strong clear emphasis on the feeling experiences of grieving persons. y It is relatively easily understood and applied without necessarily relying on its psychodynamic underpinnings. y By presenting tasks it provides a structure for the grieving person as well as the therapist. y This set of tasks can provide grieving persons a sense of order, self- control, and self determination in their lives.  Criticism y Implicit stage like quality. y It is very tempting to fit all grieving individuals into a mold of working through the stages (tasks) of grieving. y Nothing could be less therapeutic. Meaning reconstruction with grieving persons (Robert Neimeyer,1998) Emphasizes the uniqueness of individuals experiences of grieving. Life- a story telling process Grief therapy is primarily an opportunity for grieving persons to tell their stories in ways that will help them to make sense of loss and of life. People write and rewrite their stories and thus develop a sense of meaning, purpose, and identity. Losses disrupt our stories; significant stories often trigger a search for meaning. Consequently in grief therapy the reconstruction of the grieving person s narrative will be taking place.

 This grief therapy consists of variety of activities which intended to self reflection, a search for meaning and ultimately a new story about oneself.  Verbal techniques y y y Writing letter to the diseased to express feeling and to accept new reality Keeping a journal to label their own experiences during a loss and afterwards. Writing poetry etc.

 Less verbal techniques y y y y Drawing stories of events in one s life, including a drawing about the loss. Compiling a book of photograph Personal rituals Strengths  Existentially oriented approach  Begins with search for meaning in life in the face of loss  It encompasses a variety of techniques with the goal of helping grieving persons to make sense of their lives again  Its applicability of treatments to different types of losses and grievers Criticisms Too much emphasis on the cognitive and volitional aspects of the person. Conclusion The experience of loss, particularly through death, is usually a confusing experience that triggers a search for meaning in the majority of bereaved persons. Grief therapy can provide the grievers with a scheme of mourning and recovery by working through the tasks of mourning. Thus grief therapy helps the griever in reconstructing the meaning of one s life.