THE BAD BABY-SITTER

To the good baby-sitters out there, like the ones my children had.

isa was a young girl who came from a faraway town in the Brazilian countryside. She came when she was still a girl, to work at a familys home. Her mother, Fausta, worked at a farm and never had time to take care of her own children. As soon as she gave birth to a child, she had to go back to work, otherwise she would not get any money. The father was a heavy drinker, so he was not a good farm worker. He couldnt get much done. The relationship between them was very bad. Sometimes he used to beat his wife and sometimes he was beaten by her. People said that he was beaten more than he beat her. People also said that, from time to time, she betrayed her husband. This fact did not harm either of them. Thus, from bad to worse, they lived their lives. Misa was brought up without love. From her mother she got what her mother had received from her grandmother. And the aggravating fact that Fausta was filled with resentment. The reason was in her unconsciousness. There must be some cause in her brain that she never discovered. Her mother slapped her brothers a lot, as she thought it was necessary for their education, but in Misas case it was worse. Much worse. The physical abuse against Misa happened for almost anything she did and also for what she didnt do. Once a neighbor lady, who was a cultured woman, reprehended the mother for the exaggerated beating of her daughter and even asked if the girl was, in fact, her daughter. One cannot even imagine the scandal Fausta made and the grudge she carried against the good-intentioned neighbor. She even turned to her daughter, furiously: - Damned curse! Misa felt guilty for all that confusion, it seemed unbelievable. She did not feel pity for her defendant she seemed to be the cause
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of their quarrels but she felt pity for Fausta. Sometimes she would get close to her mother and her mother would get a little stick to poke at her arms, legs and even her face. - Hot dog, devils daughter, stinking girl. And she laughed, a scandalous laughter. The poor child thought that strange relationship to be normal. She even laughed gently. Her mother was the best she had in life and she treated her that way... In her own way, Misa loved her mother and wanted to be loved. She then created a surreal substitution: beating was a sign of closeness to her mother. Neurotically she linked it to a feeling of pseudo-affection. Sometimes her father, drunk, would come close to her and lift up her dress. In these occasions the mother, who was not an alcoholic, would come and take the girl away and the couple would begin to fight again. When the father was sober, still smelling of alcohol, he treated her coldly or swore at her: - Get out of here, you are useless. She never received a glance from her parents, nor from anyone else. She never even had a toy. She was brought up as a little animal. Her self-esteem was very low. One day her father died and, for her, the situation managed to become even worse. Her father-in-law, that her mother managed to marry, molested her. Fausta defended her with all her strength, fighting him. Nevertheless, one day she approached her and asked her to go away, because she did not want to get rid of her new man. When she became a woman and got a beautiful body, and was first touched by a man, she became amazed by it all. She believed it to be the love that people spoke about on television. He took advantage of her body, she did not even know what birth control was and soon she got pregnant. It took a long time for her to discover that lack of menstruation was a sign that she was expecting a baby. The young man told her, laughing sarcastically: - You must be crazy I have never had sex with such an ugly woman, noa whore like you gives herself to anyone. Even in the 21st Century, men, when they dont want to be responsible for a child whatever the reason may be they continue to tarnish the pregnant womans reputation, defaming her
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in all possible ways. This happens even with women who belong to higher classes, imagine the poor girls who have no one to support them! Misa had nobody to help her. On the contrary, everybody criticized her. Even one of her brothers said that she was tarnishing the familys honor. He had listened to that phrase in a song. Her mother blustered: - Your fate could only be this. I have always known that from you nothing good would comeDont even dare to think about bringing this fatherless son here, to our house. Find a solution for this problem! She did not cry. She always knew that nobody would listen to her crying, but she suffered much. She did not understand why she never got annoyed when someone cried close to her. She worked as a maid. When her employer found out she was pregnant, he deceived the poor girl, making her sign some papers. The next day, the employer dismissed her. She even found work at another home, hiding her belly, but when the other boss discovered it, she made a huge fuss, dismissing her. She then went to work as a bar cleaner, in late hours, until her son was born. He was born at a public maternity hospital, in very precarious conditions. She had a normal delivery and no one came to visit her. She left the place not knowing where to go. Where did she go? Imagine you, listener! For sure, nothing was easy or good. As she did not succeed in finding daycare, a month later she got a lady to take care of her son during the day. Her brother got her a place to work and there she went. The money left over was hardly enough to feed the two. At the maternity hospital, a pretty and welldressed young lady who looked like an actress taught her how to take contraceptive pills and to use condoms. Some months later, she met another young man. He flirted with all the girls he saw and stayed at the bar with her after midnight, when he was drunk and could get no other woman. She did not realize this and told others that he was her lover. After a day having sex without any protection, another pregnancy came. When she told him she was pregnant, the answer was similar to the one given by the father of her first son.
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Her world collapsed all around her, the same way, and everyone repeated the same scene. She suffered a lot and did not cry. Everything was the same as the first delivery. But, this time, instead of one, she had to leave two children to be cared for that lady and to go off to work. She felt something good regarding her children; nevertheless, something inside of her was blocked and she didnt give them too much attention. Despite everything, she felt them bonded to her. It all was so weird. She didnt like being a mother; she did not have a maternal instinct. Her children were like a heavy bundle of clothes that she had to carry. She did not wish to have them and they came against her will. The stylish lady at the maternity hospital, who looked as an actress, worried about her and enrolled her in a birth control program. They put something inside her belly. She felt very modern and prepared for a soap-opera-like love. She even managed to stay some years without getting pregnant and she had many men. Each and every one used her body. With no scruples, they used her in all kinds of sex. She considered herself an expert on the subject. She read pornographic magazines and imagined lust to be normal sex. This way she passed from one hand to another. At each look and any time she met a man, she made a fantasy of a great love. Her parameter was based on TV soap operas. She loved them, imagining herself as those good and glamorous characters. She also imagined herself kissing and making love with sensual actors. She didnt like her employers, but she flattered them, in a false way. Whenever she was reprehended, be it in a fair or unfair way, she apologized with no feeling or sincerity. In a hidden way, she did all the evil deeds she could, and the landlady wasnt aware of it. And she felt guilt about it. She had bad employers she also had good employers. She abused the ones who did her good, not being able to accept it in gratitude. Some years passed without her getting pregnant. She adored to go out in the evening, to participate in bohemian events. She left
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her children alone or with anyone she found, to take care of them. She would leave her children even with any mad lady. What she wanted was to enjoy herself at parties or dancing. During one of those parties, fully drunk, she had sex with a drugged man. And as God created sex for reproduction, she happened to get pregnant again. This time she went to despair, she swore, she cried, it is said that she even took medicine to abort, with no success. She did not have money to pay for an abortion. Needless to say that the drug addict cooperated in no way to solve the problem. If he knew about it, he pretended that he had nothing to do with it. She was already used to giving birth alone. This time she said that it was an independent production, as it was said by a blond and very famous actress whom she admired very much. This time everything was quite worse. No one knows why. If it was due to the fact that she was not as young as before, or because of the madness performed to abort or some disease she got from being with so many men and so much lust she engaged in. What is certain is that that pregnancy was much more difficult. She had pain and a vaginal infection, it was a bad pregnancy. Because of this, she could not work as much as she used to. The family gave her the minimum support possible but complained the maximum possible. Due to all of this she and her children were never hungry and became quite thin. The delivery was a drama. She even wanted to give her son to someone to raise, but the poor baby was so thin and so ugly, that she couldnt find anybody to take care of him. Amidst this financial and social chaos, together with her precarious health, her brother told her he had an excellent job for her. A good salary, a good employer, labor documents in good order. It was to work as a baby-sitter. - It is too far away, I will need to wake-up early in the morning and will be returning home at nine, ten oclock, in the eveningI dont like to take care of other ladies babies, and dont like to care of mine. And what about my children, who will they stay with? - Pathetic as you are, you get the opportunity to have an excellent job and say it is no good, you, useless! Her mother swore at her to show that the job offered was the only good thing she could get.
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She had neither enough good health, nor the will to accept that job, but she felt obliged to accept it. She had no other choice. She would wake-up before dawn, take her children by fits and starts and leave them with a bug eyed lady. That lady, still sleeping would then complain about the little ones crying. She had to take two or three buses to arrive at the employers house. A quite beautiful house, having everything one wants. As soon as she arrived, her bosses left for the gym or for a walk, in order to feel even better. She had to prepare breakfast and care for the child. She would give him milk, have her breakfast and then the two arrived to eat all that was good, tasty and healthy. Yes, in order to have that skin and that body, they needed a balanced diet. And she was the one who had to do what she considered to be their fancy. Then she had to work in the kitchen, to clean, do the laundry and iron the clothes. The man seemed not to work much. In the morning he stayed in front of the computer and in the afternoon he left the house. Sometimes, even before evening he would be back home. He then used the computer, again. The lady, was worse than him. In the morning she pretended to do something, she had her lunch and would say she was going to give a class. I dont know of what subject that class could be, she didnt seem to be intelligent. She also loved to use the computer. Both of them also used to be hanging on the phone for long time. She never understood why that Jane Doe required her to leave their house after sunset. - To avoid having to care of the child. Does she treat you well? - She is false, she pretends she likes me and that she worries about me, about my health and about my children. There were also the two grandmothers who fought with each other, for the supposed grandsons love. One would buy a gift, the other one would then do her utmost to surpass the other. And, this way, they accelerated their competition. The grandfathers followed their wives. This exaggeration annoyed Misa very much. She never had a thing, nor anyones support and this stupid young lady had all this There was also the gentleman - What a beautiful man! Younger than me, but sexy. Although she offered herself openly to him, he gave her no attention.
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- I know how to have sex with such a manthat nosey one. He was very affectionate to his wife, he made compliments to her and seemed to be enchanted by her. He loved to go out with her and used to give her clothes and presents. The mistress was so careless that she left labels on the ground and Misa could see the extremely expensive prices. Her lady-boss used to be proud of the extremely high prices she paid for what she bought. Sometimes they were higher than Misas salary: the amount she dreamed of her whole life and that she never succeeded in having. The also spent absurd amounts on toys. They were two pampered people who had a son. It is usual for maids to envy or to admire their lady employers. It would even be a compliment to their employers, to desire their clothes, their perfumes and even their husbandsAs Misa didnt have good feelings for the nosey one, the only feeling left was envy. On week-ends she was tired, very tired. Then her children would come, willing to play and fighting with each other to see who could get closer to her. She would get annoyed and it was terrible. She liked to beat them. She wanted to go out to dance and have sex, as her libido was quite strong and she liked sex so much. As she left her children locked to go to dance she had neither money nor someone to care of them the neighbors, the family and her mother reprehended her and swore at her a lot. During that week-end, besides the usual recrimination, her oldest son told her that the bug eyed lady hardly gave them food (for that reason, they were so thin). And she even beat them a lot. Beating was not a problem for her. She had also been beaten by her motherBut their hunger upset her. On Monday, as she went back to work, she found the very pampered madamShe felt very angry. But a false smile accompanied her. Sometimes the employer would take care of her own son. But the handsome gentlemans parents went away for a long trip and the father of the boring girl got sick and his wife had to take care of him, at the hospital. The mistress had to take a course during the whole day and she would come home only for lunch.
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Misa had to care for the child. She felt horrible. Nonetheless, as it was usual for her, she told her employer that she loved babysitting. Her boss, the lady, gave her no tasks that day and left her free to play with the boy. She felt the little king, as the boy was called, unbearable. He gave her an unpleasant feeling, but she lied, as usual. But, whenever she was alone with the little baby, she would make grimaces at him; when he called her she pretended not to hear. He had been so pampered and protected that he didnt learn to create defenses. As anger, inside her, grew more and more, each day and each week-end, things began to get worse. In the beginning she swore at him all the swearing she was exposed. Subsequently there were little humiliations she submitted him to followed by physical aggressions. She would oblige him to apologize if he moved. In fact, she wanted him to apologize for all the evil she got in life. She even submitted him to lust procedures. It is interesting to notice that she did not understand the great evil she was causing him. The child began to get sick, always wishing to stay close to his mother. As his mother had some responsibilities and had to go out, he became aggressive and worse, as days passed by. His father then installed a camera to see what was going on and he filmed the horror the child was experiencing. Then, a scandal exploded. The father entered the house, went to the computer, came back and took the child. One hour later, the house was crowded with policemen, radio and TV reporters. They called her a monster. In the beginning she did not realize that everything was about her. She was even pleased when the TV camera tried to film her. But her boss (the gentleman) was furious at her. Everyone accused her. Little by little she realized she would be arrested. Although she did not realize that her behavior with the child was criminal. Right from the beginning she denied it all. She denied that it happened, did not regret for what she had done and she did not consider her acts wrong. She didnt want so many cameras filming her. She covered her face. She did not think about her children being left alone in the world, she thought about her mothers swearing at her. As she left the employers house to get into the
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police car, the neighbors and the little crowd that came to the place, screamed at her. She was afraid of being lynched. Through a vent of the window she saw her pampered mistress crying, holding her son against her and giving an interview to several journalists, who crowded around her. Everybody was pampering the boring mother. Misas mind was travelling at a thousand miles/hour and she did not quite understand what was going on. But the swearing against her and the affliction to give the lady annoyed her deeply. Somehow a huge strength came from inside and she managed to free herself a bit and to spit in the direction of the mother who then fainted. Suddenly the policemen began to beat the bad baby-sitter. The journalists and other people who were there, even supported them. She arrived at the police station covered with a blouse, since her face was disfigured and had bones broken. The doctor, who assisted her, had a son and said with indignation: - I dont know how she managed to stay alive. But had she died, it would not have been such a bad thing at all Even the human rights lady divorced and struggling to raise her two daughters created some problems and didnt do anything to help her. During various weeks the subject of the cruel woman who beat young children filled the papers, the low level ones. At the jail she had to stay away from the others. Her life managed to become even worse. Sometime later she died, burnt during a prisoners rebellion. Her children were left alone, in the world... THE END