DO YOU KNOW YOUR CONSTITUTION?

Kevin Bleyer

Q. Who is "the Father of the Constitution?"

 George Washington
 James Madison
 Glenn Beck
 I don't know -- I missed that episode of "Maury"

Q. What is the Magna Carta?

 one of the three ships Christopher Columbus sailed to discover the New
World
 the name of the gun that Aaron Burr used to shoot Alexander Hamilton
 the 13th century English charter of laws that inspired the Constitution of the
United States
 the current Guinness record-holder for "biggest known Carta"

Q. What was "the miracle at Philadelphia?"

 that despite the terrible condition of the roads, the delegates still made it to
Assembly Hall
 that despite their disagreements, the Framers still managed to write a
Constitution
 that despite the heat in Pennsylvania, chafing wasn't an issue

Q. What is the Great Compromise?

 The controversial choice to locate the Capital not in the north or the south,
but in the District of Columbia
 The controversial choice to give the House proportional representation, but
the Senate equal representation for every state
 The controversial choice to count slaves as three-fifths of other Americans
for population counts and suffrage allocations
 The controversial choice during the Constitutional Convention to let
Connecticut's Roger Sherman select which restaurant to order lunch in from

Q. What does the Third Amendment forbid?

 the quartering of soldiers
 the halving of sailors
 the doubling of tinkers
 the tripling of spies

Q. What document did the Constitution of the United States essentially

replace?
 the Articles of Confederation
 the Bill of Rights
 the Federalist Papers
 the Book of Kells
 IRS Form 1040-EZ
Q. Why did the Framers think the Articles of Confederation needed to be
replaced?
 it was too weak for the needs of the country
 it was too strong for states' rights advocates to stomach
 delegate Rufus King spilled coffee on it

Q. Prohibition. Crazy, right? I mean, what were they thinking?

 I know!
 Tell me about it.
 Seriously, who is the genius that came up with that idea?
 (hiccup)

Q. If the Framers were alive today, what would they say about the state of the
country?
 "Just as we planned it"
 "My heavens, what has become of the United States?!"
 "We still need a More Perfect Union, and with patience, steadfastness, and
strength of character, we can achieve it"
 “I’m a Belieber”

Q. Who is the single most qualified American to rewrite the Constitution of the
United States of America?
 Kevin Bleyer