Parenting TeensEffective

Discipline

Introduction
Many parents use physical punishment such as
slapping or beating to discipline their teen when
they misbehave. This type of abuse has long term
psychological effects on our adolescents. It
teaches them that violence is an acceptable way of
making others do something and that it is
acceptable to hit someone who is smaller or
weaker when angry. Violent discipline damages the
relationship between parent and teen.

Authoritarian

Has low self esteem

Exhibits lack of self respect
Is withdrawn from relationships
Refuses to communicate
Engages in disruptive behaviour to gain attention
Engages in illegal and dangerous activities
Has difficulty following rules or obeying authority

INTRODUCTION
Equally damaging are parents who give teens few
or no boundaries and allow them to have his or
own way by having temper tantrums or by playing
one adult against another.
They have no concept of the reality that there are
consequences to every action.
This teen is greedy, self centered and generally
unpleasant to be around.

Permissive Parents

Manipulates parents
Develops insecurity because of lack of parental
firmness
Expects others to accept whatever he or she does
Throws temper tantrums
Associates softness with weakness
Behaves harshly in search of some kind of balance

Neglectful

Is rebellious
Feels insecure and worthless
Performs poorly in school
Acts uncontrollably or behaves inappropriately
Is irresponsible as an adult
Disregards rules, laws, and boundaries
Engages in disruptive behaviour
Often becomes a neglectful parent

Objectives

Explain the difference between punishment

and discipline.
Establish guidelines for discipline.
Many parents believe that physical
punishment is the best way to handle
children. They believe that children must be
made to feel bad if they are going to learn
their lesson. Discipline, on the other hand,
is the best tool for parents to use if they
want to achieve positive, long-term
parenting success.

Disciplined Children make a Disciplined Society

Why is discipline important in a society ?

WHY IS DISCIPLINE IMPORTANT?

For road safety

Increased productivity
Upholding the law
Keeping order

Consequences Of Physical Punishment

Does physical punishment teach unhealthy

lessons?
Is physical violence an acceptable way to
resolve conflicts and get revenge?
Do our adolescents learn from the way we
behave?
Do you say to yourself, I spank or hit, but I
am not abusive?

 What are some of the ways that physical

punishment affects adolescents negatively?

PHYSICAL PUNISHMENT AFFECTS TEEN

NEGATIVELY!

It can teach an adolescent that pain equals love

It teaches them that violence is acceptable
behavior
It humiliates them, causing low self-esteem
It teaches them not to work unless someone is
beating them.
It can make them afraid of communicating with
people

Ineffective discipline using physical punishment causes 4

Rs

1. Resentment This is unfair.

2. Revenge Ill get even later.
3. Retreat Ill just stay by myself or Ill
hide and do it
4. Rebellion Ill do it anyway, just to prove
who is in control.

The Four Effective Rs

For Discipline to be effective, it must meet all

of the following guidelines:
1. Revealed ahead of time, whenever possible
and why.
You need to be home by 11pm or you will not go
to the movies on Saturday.
Make sure your adolescent understands why he
or she is being disciplined.

The 4 Rs

2. Related logically to the behavior.

Discipline the behavior at hand, and not
something that happened in the past.
i.e. act as soon as possible, so that your
adolescent will associate the misbehavior
with the consequence.

The 4 Rs

3. Reasonable in extent and/or time

The degree and length of discipline should fit
the crime.
Tell your adolescent how long the
consequences will last (eg. how long is the
punishment).

The 4 Rs

4.Respectful to both parents and adolescents

Be firm and fair; do not insult or humiliate children.
This is sometimes difficult when you are angry, but
it is worth the effort. You will be setting a good
example for your adolescent to follow.
Tell your adolescent that you love him or her
unconditionally. Whenever you want a positive
behavior to be repeated, use encouragement and
praise.

BALANCED PARENT
Parent who sets boundaries, has clearly defined
rules which are consistently enforced and one
who shows a lot of warmth and acceptance.
It is a combination of being respectful and firm.
Helps solve problems in a way that makes both
parents and teen happy. It teaches responsibility
and clearly conveys a parents limits and
expectations for acceptable behaviour

BALANCED PARENT

Before we discipline, parents should ask themselves, What

will this discipline teach my adolescent? We should not
discipline out of anger, or out of a desire to control our children.
The word discipline comes from the Greek word disciple.
Disciples follow a leader who guides them. The parents role in
discipline, therefore, is that of teacher and leader not
controller.

What do we
get for all our efforts? A teen who :

Has a healthy sense of self respect and self worth

Is secure and stable
Obeys rules and authority
Performs well in school
Handles pressure well
Communicates well with others
Is fair and objective
Raises his or her own children to be balanced
parents

GET SUPPORT! TAKE TIME OUT!

Sometimes we as parents need also to be discipled.

Put on your oxygen mask before attending to your child
I can do all things through Him who gives me strength
My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made
perfect in weakness

ThankYou!
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