Effective Sentences

Sentences show
grammatical
relationships.
There are also style
relationships.

Effective sentences should

be correct, and
1. have unity of idea
2. emphasize the right parts
3. show cohesion of parts
4. be precise in meaning
5. be concise
6. show word propriety
7. be clear in meaning
8. show variety in structure.

be
correct; and have unity of
idea, emphasize the right
parts, show cohesion of
parts, be precise in
meaning, be concise, show
word propriety, be clear in
meaning, and show variety
in structure.
Effective sentences should

Effective Sentences
Before being effective,
sentences should be
correct.

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Comment on the following

compound noun
A practical multipurpose
compact distillation tower
effluent gas continuous
analysis solid state unit

We cannot give you a room on the

executive floor today, but we can
provide you with a room on the
18th floor with a sea view.

We can offer you an excellent

room on the 18th floor with a seaview since all the rooms on the
executive floor are already
occupied.

Timeliness is considered a
priority by all managers.
A key priority of all managers is
timeliness.
All managers consider timeliness
as one of their top priorities.

 Explore the possibility of

ordering additional supplies and

ensure that the supplies can be
delivered on time.
Explore the possibility of
ordering additional supplies, but
most importantly, ensure that the
suppliers can deliver them on
time!

If on the date of opening of bid, the

average price of domestic product is not
more than 10 percent above the average
of types, which price should reflect the
price of premium quality products, and if
reasonable bid proposals have been
received for the whole quantity, the said
bid will be awarded for local products
that do not exceed 10 percent more than
foreign equivalents and the procedures
set forth for awarding contracts will
apply.

A bid will be awarded for local products

if the average price of domestic
product is not more than 10 percent
above the average price of other
representative types
if the price reflects the price of
premium quality products
if reasonable bid proposals have been
received for the whole quantity
if they do not exceed 10 percent more
than foreign equivalents
if the procedures set forth for
awarding contracts will apply.

 If the average price of domestic

product is not more than 10 percent

above the average price of other
representative types
if the price reflects the price of
premium quality products
if reasonable bid proposals have been
received for the whole quantity
if they do not exceed 10 percent more
than foreign equivalents
if the procedures set forth for
awarding contracts will apply,
the bid will be awarded for local products.

Electricity is useful. Electricity is

practical. Electricity is economic.
Electricity is generated in large power
plants. Electricity is environmentally
friendly. Electricity is expensive.
Electricity is important. Electricity is
the backbone of modern life and
economies. Electricity in Egypt is
80% from natural gas. Electricity in
France is 60% from nuclear sources.

 All supervisors are herewith

instructed to return the
performance appraisal forms
for all their employees to the
designated HR officer.
Please return the performance
appraisal forms to the HR
department.

 Please be informed that for

certain uncontrollable
circumstances, we will be
unable to handout required
elements in time because
available resources shall not be
mobilized in time.

 They accepted work in a

computer company; the future of

data processing looks good.
Because the oil prices is low, the

search for new sources of energy is

intensive.

Working very hard on the budget,

the management approved the

outline rapidly.
Today, a jet engine develops over
40,000 lb. of thrust which
weighs 5000 lb.

Afford an opportunity
At this point in time
Feel free to
In the event that
Fully cognizant of
In addition to the above

Allow
Now
Please
If
Aware
Also

Employees will be able to nominate

two employees to receive the best
employee of the month award
I am sending you this announcement
to let you all know that Friday will be a
working day.
The General Manager definitely gave a
fine presentation that was actually
heard by the employees.
We must consider this problem.

Negative

If you get a negative performance

evaluation during your probation
period, you will be terminated.
Positive tone
You will secure the position, once
you successfully complete your
probation period.

1) Unity
The sentence should deal
with one idea, or connects
related thoughts.

Unity of the sentence is

disturbed by

grammar and style errors,

unrelated thoughts,
long parts of speech,
misplaced parts of speech,
excessive details.

2) Emphasis
Special attention given to particular
words or part(s) of speech.
Ideas vary in importance; therefore,
expressing them should vary in
emphasis.

2) Emphasis
The writer can gain or vary emphasis by
placing important parts at the position of
natural stress
repeating important parts
arranging ideas in order of climax
using intensifiers; subordination,
abruptly changing sentence length
putting parts out of customary order
using parallelism, passive/active,
punctuation, italicization, emphatic
mood, etc.

Timeliness is considered a
priority by all managers.
In general, timeliness is
considered a priority by all
managers.
A key priority of all managers is
timeliness.
All managers consider timeliness
as one of their top priorities.

 Christopher Choles invented

typewriters.
Typewriters were invented by
Christopher Choles.
Typewriters were invented around
1860.

The increasing price of oil may cause

a shift to other sources of energy.

Worldwide, coal should last for at
least 300 years.
Oil, on the other hand, will be virtually
depleted within the next 60 years.
A method with old foundations, rock
splitting by humidifying wood, is still
used these days.
True, we have long meetings without
results.

 At the present time, consumers are

not interested in solar heaters

because they are still expensive
despite the wide publicity we have
made for this article.
At the present time, solar heaters do
not interest customers because they
are still expensive despite the wide
publicity we have made for this
article.

Beginning phrases usually do not

affect emphasis of the main clause or
other clauses of the sentence.

The expanding gases drive the turbine,

and the same gases are used to heat
intake air of the air supply system.
Whether the engineer is engaged in civil,
mechanical or other profession, he is
confronted with data and figures.
Basic to all progress are integrity, faith
and hard work.

Egypt does have considerable but -badly managed -- human resources.

Unlike readers of the academic
world, most readers of the real
world read selectively: rather than
digesting a piece of writing, they
skim-read most of it, skipping from
one main idea to another until they
come to something that particularly
interests them. Such readers are
forced to read this way.

Example: Emphasis, cohesion of texts

The two processes, speaking and writing, are not
identical. Writing is not simply speech written
down on paper. Learning to write is not just a
natural extension of learning to speak a language.
We learned to speak our first language at home
without systematic instruction; whereas, most of
us had to be taught in school how to write that
same language. Many adult native speakers of a
language find writing difficult. A speaker speaks
to a listener who is right there, nodding or
frowning, or interrupting or questioning. For the
writer, the reader's response is either delayed or
nonexistent.

Social Skills
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.

Teamwork and Group Skills

Environment Protection
General Social Skills
General Knowledge
Psychology
Networking.

Cohesion
The sentence is cohesive when parts are tied
together. Cohesion can be limited to the
sentence, between sentences, and between
paragraphs.

The chief engineer had, in spite of his not

willing to share us this meeting, pride of the

department's performance.
The new hardware is the one to, whether
expensive or not, use in design.
The production dropped 10%. Consider almost
Always those who watch television rarely read
much.

Cohesion
Cohesion Tools
coordination or subordination;
information ordering: active or
passive voices, old before new
repeating specific words within the
same sentence.

Pronouns
the definite article
demonstratives
connectives and transition words
visual formatting
other ways of organization.

Example: Emphasis, cohesion of texts

The two processes, speaking and writing, are not
identical. Writing is not simply speech written
down on paper. Learning to write is not just a
natural extension of learning to speak a language.
We learned to speak our first language at home
without systematic instruction; whereas, most of
us had to be taught in school how to write that
same language. Many adult native speakers of a
language find writing difficult. A speaker speaks
to a listener who is right there, nodding or
frowning, or interrupting or questioning. For the
writer, the reader's response is either delayed or
nonexistent.

If on the date of opening of bid, the

average price of domestic product is not
more than 10 percent above the average
of types, which price should reflect the
price of premium quality products, and if
reasonable bid proposals have been
received for the whole quantity, the said
bid will be awarded for local products
that do not exceed 10 percent more than
foreign equivalents and the procedures
set forth for awarding contracts will
apply.

A bid will be awarded for local products

if the average price of domestic
product is not more than 10 percent
above the average price of other
representative types
if the price reflects the price of
premium quality products
if reasonable bid proposals have been
received for the whole quantity
if they do not exceed 10 percent more
than foreign equivalents
if the procedures set forth for
awarding contracts will apply.

Cohesion

Parallelism
First of all, the good paragraph has unity: focuses
on a single idea or theme. Second, a good
paragraph has coherence: one sentence leads to
the next in some kind of logical sequence. Finally,
a good paragraph has adequate content: each
sentence contains appropriate details to support
the main idea.

Once made, you should execute the

decision.

Variety: Negative Example

We first choose the style of
brainstorming. We must not
criticize them. We always ask for
clarity. We must write results on
board. We first look for quantity not
quality. We group related thoughts.
We rank thought in terms of
priorities.

3) VARIETY
Introduce variety in texts. Avoid short simple
sentences.

Electricity is useful. Electricity is practical.

Electricity is economic. Electricity is
environmentally friendly. Electricity is
important. Electricity is generated in large
power stations
Use sentence connective: In addition
Use coordinating conjunction: and, or,
Use conjunctive adverb, however,
Use transitional expression: Price, we have seen, is
one aspect of marketing; quality is another, but
important factor.

Show tools of variety used in the

following text.
Unlike readers of the academic world,
most readers of the real world read
selectively: rather than digesting a piece
of writing, they skim-read most of it,
skipping from one main idea to another
until they come to something that
particularly interests them. Such
readers are forced to read this way.

Show tools of variety used in the

following text.
Most readers of the real world read
selectively: they skim-read most of
texts, skipping from one main idea to
another until they come to something
that particularly interests them. Such
readers are forced to read this way.

3) VARIETY

Vary sentence pattern

S-Vi or S-Vi-C. S-Vt-O or S-Vt-O-C
S-Vt-OD-preposition-Oi-COi
S-Vt-Oi-C-Od-C
Use leading phrase or clause
Use one or more of the following:
Negation, Question, Passive Voice
Monosyllabic: perform or do
Vary repetitions: full/short forms
Vary length: 8 to 28 words/sentence
Combine Clauses: coordinate/subordinate
Vary sentences type: > 40% simple, < 40%
complex, < 20% compound

Examples
The increasing price of oil may cause a shift to
other sources of energy.
Worldwide, coal should last for at least 300 years.
Oil, on the other hand, will be virtually depleted
within the next 60 years.
A method with old foundations, rock splitting by
humidifying wood, is still used these days.
True, we have long meetings without results.

Examples
A great place to work in is the one where employees
trust the people they work for, have pride in what they
do, and enjoy the people they work with. Companies
with good workplace tend to be better performers in
financial terms. The heart of the workplace is in the
quality of relation-ships in it: employees trust the
people they work for. If a business needs to be
changed, the trust within the workplace will be the
currency with which that change will be paid.

Hi Sue,
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling
brother. I thought I would share my problem with
you to make you realize how I work. I first must
bore you with a few technicalities of my job.
My office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a
wet suit to the office. This time of year the water
is quite cool. So we have a diesel powered
industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece sucks
the water out of the sea and heats it to a
delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to
the diver through a hose. when I get to the
bottom, I take the hose and stuff it down the back
of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with
warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.

Everything was going well until all of a sudden,

my butt started to itch. So, of course, I
scratched it. This only made things worse. .
The hot water machine had sucked up a
jellyfish. When I scratched what I thought was
an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into
my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my
dilemma over the communicator. He instructed
me to make 3 agonizing decompression stops
totaling 35 minutes before I could reach the
surface to begin dry decompression. When I
arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but
my brass helmet. I couldn't poop for 2 days
because my butt hole was swollen shut.

Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. I thought I

would share my problem with you to make you realize how I work.
I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.
My office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a wet suit to the
office. This time of year the water is quite cool. So we have a
diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece sucks
the water out of the sea and heats it to a delightful temperature. It
then pumps it down to the diver through a hose. when I get to the
bottom, I take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit.
This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a
Jacuzzi.
Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to
itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse.
. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish. When I
scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the
jellyfish into my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my
dilemma over the communicator. I was instructed to make 3
agonizing decompression stops totaling 35 minutes before I
could reach the surface to begin dry decompression. When I
arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass
helmet. I couldn't poop for 2 days because my butt hole was

So, next time you are having

a bad day at work, think about
how much worse it would be
if you had a jellyfish shoved
up your butt.

Conciseness

Afford an opportunity
At this point in time
Feel free to
In the event that
Fully cognizant of
In addition to the above

allow
now
please
if
aware
also