What goes up the chimney

down, but not down the

chimney up?
An umbrella
Dad, You usually talk a lot
on the phone. Why did you
only talk half an hour?
Daughter, It was a
wrong number!
On which side of an
ostrich are the feathers?
The outside!
After a careful
examination the doctor
said, Im sorry to tell
you that youve only got
four hours to live.
Is there anyone you want
to see before you go?

Yes, answered the

patient. Another
doctor.
Joey, can you come out
and play?
No. I have to help my
dad do my homework.
Why did the clown take
off his shoes?

His feet felt funny.

What did the elevator say
to the doctor?
Im coming down with
something.
Where do spices go when
they are sick?
To see Dr. Pepper.
What did the gum say to
the shoe?
Im stuck on you.
What is the longest word
in English? Smiles
Theres a mile between
each s.