Organizing sentences

Last night, Susan and I went to the movies,

where we watched The Avengers. We plan
to see a Tagalog film next week. We also
sat around the Trinoma lobby before
showtime. The movie was great. The
actors were good and could really emote.
We enjoyed the ending. Before the
movie, we had dinner at Sbarro.
Last night, Susan and I went to the movies,
where we watched The Avengers. Before
the movie, we had dinner at SBarro. We
also sat around the Trinoma lobby before
showtime. The movie was great. The
actors were good and could really emote.
We enjoyed the ending. Next week, we
plan to see a Tagalog film.
Example of using analogy
 In Bumpers v. Smith, the court protected a bona fide
purchaser for value, which is like protecting the holder in
due course in this case. In Bumpers, the plaintiff gave her
diamond necklace to a jeweler for repair. The jeweler then
sold the necklace to the defendant at a fair price. When the
plaintiff sued the defendant for return of the necklace, the
court found for the defendant because he was a bona fide
purchaser for value–he had no knowledge that the sale was
wrongful and paid a fair price for the necklace. The case
declared that the law favors bona fide purchasers for value.
The same principle is the basis of the doctrine of holder in
due course in negotiable instruments law. When a holder
takes a check made out or endorsed to bearer for value and
without notice of any defenses, she should be protected even
though she took from a thief because she is a bona fide
purchaser for value. The original owner could have protected
himself by making the check out to order rather than bearer.
This court does not have subject matter
jurisdiction over this matter for three
reasons. First, no federal question is
involved. Second, the amount in
controversy is less than $50,000.
Finally, both the plaintiff and defendant
are citizens of North Carolina.
Consequently, this court should grant
defendant's motion to dismiss.
This court does not have subject matter
jurisdiction over this matter. First, no
federal question is involved. This suit
concerns only state law tort issues.
Second, the amount in controversy is
less than $50,000; at most, damages
comprise $35,000. Finally, both the
plaintiff and defendant are citizens of
North Carolina. The plaintiff's domicile
is Durham, and the defendant's
principal place of business is Raleigh.
Accordingly, this court should grant the
defendant's motion to dismiss.
This court should dismiss plaintiff's complaint. This
court lacks subject matter jurisdiction over the
matter. No federal question is involved. This suit
concerns only state law tort issues. The amount in
controversy is less than $50,000. The damages
comprise at most $35,000. Both the plaintiff and
defendant are citizens of North Carolina. The
plaintiff's domicile is Durham. The defendant's
principal place of business is Raleigh. This court
should grant defendant's motion to dismiss
Paragraph Unity - a paragraph
should contain only one topic,
and each sentence in the
paragraph should relate to the
topic sentence.
John Jones was injured when a lathe he was working
on malfunctioned. Jones’ employer, KKE, bought the
lathe six months ago from Lathes Are Us. Lathes Are
Us gave no express warranties with the lathe, and it
properly disclaimed all implied warranties. Jones lost
two fingers in the accident and suffered severe cuts on
his right arm. Jones incurred $10,000 in hospital bills
from his injuries, and he is probably permanently
disabled. After the malfunction, the lathe caught fire
damaging the lathe. Because the lathe is KKE's only
lathe and because it cannot find a suitable
replacement for the lathe, KKE will have to shut down
for a month while the lathe is being repaired. Such a
shut down may cause KKE to file bankruptcy.
The above paragraph lacks unity because it
encompasses too many unrelated ideas: 1)
Jones‘ injury, 2) KKE's purchase of the
lathe, 3) lack of warranties, 4) specification
of Jones' injuries, 5) damage to the lathe,
and 6) the fact that KKE will have to shut
down while the lathe is being repaired. One
can break the above paragraph into three
paragraphs, each of which is unified.
 John Jones, a KKE employee, was injured when
a lathe he was working on malfunctioned. He lost two
fingers in the accident and suffered severe cuts on his
right arm. Jones incurred $10,000 in hospital bills from
his injuries, and he is probably permanently disabled.
After the malfunction, the lathe caught fire,
damaging the lathe. Because the lathe is KKE's only
lathe and because it cannot find a suitable
replacement for the lathe, KKE will have to shut down
for a month while the lathe is being repaired. Such a
shut down may cause KKE to file bankruptcy.
KKE bought the lathe six months ago from
Lathes Are Us. Lathes Are Us gave no express
warranties with the lathe, and it properly disclaimed
all implied warranties.
Exercise
Exercise – edit the ff paragraph to create coherence

Joe's favorite sport is basketball. He likes the

continuous action and frequent scoring. He likes
tough inside play. He likes three-point shooting.
His favorite team is the Bulls. They play in his
hometown. His hometown is Chicago. They won
the championship last year. They have his
favorite player Michael Jordan. He also likes John
Paxson. Joe went to twenty home games last
year. He watched the rest of the games on
television.
Joe's favorite sport is basketball because of
the continuous action and frequent scoring.
He also likes the tough inside play and
three-point shooting. Joe's favorite
basketball team is his hometown Chicago
Bulls who won the championship last year.
The Bulls have Joe's favorite players
Michael Jordan and John Paxson. Joe went
to twenty Bull's games last year, and he
watched the rest on television.
Pop Quiz
Copyright is an intangible, intellectual
property right. It protects an author's rights
in writings, which includes paintings,
sculpture, and music. Copyright attaches
when a work is "fixed" in a tangible medium.
Registration is not required for a valid
copyright. However, registration allows
recovery of "statutory" damages and
attorney's fees. Like registration, notice is
not required for copyright protection since
adoption of the Berne Convention. (64 words)
Copyright is an intangible property right. It is
an intellectual property right. It protects an
author's rights in writings. Writings includes
paintings, sculpture, and music. Copyright
attaches when a work is "fixed". Fixed means
fixed in a tangible medium. Registration is not
required for a valid copyright. Registration
does allow recovery of "statutory" damages. It
allows recovery of attorney's fees. Notice is not
required for copyright protection. This has
changed since adoption of the Berne
Convention. (76 words)