Psikologi Keluarga

Pertemuan 4

ARI PRATIWI., M.PSI

 Transition to parenting
“The transition to becoming a parent
represents a major life change. Interest in
this developmental change is universal. ”
(Cristoph Heinicke)

• Orangtua yang mampu, efisien, tidak

mudah cemas, fleksibel dalam pemecahan
masalah, mampu menjaga hubungan
timbal balik yang positif terutama dengan
pasangan serta mampu mengatur otonomi
dan self esteem mereka sendiri, dianggap
lebih mampu menciptakan lingkungan
pengasuhan yang optimal.
• Pengasuhan yang optimal mencakup
responsif terhadap kebutuhan, mendorong
otonomi dan eksplorasi pengalaman
kognitif.
Family Developmental
Framework
Bagaimana suami-istri dan
anggota keluarga lainnya
melakukan berbagi peran yang
berbeda dan tugas
perkembangan dalam pernikahan
dan keluarga sebagaimana
perkembangan tugas
perkembangan sepanjang
rentang kehidupan.
 Transition to parenting
“The transition to becoming a parent
represents a major life change. Interest in
this developmental change is universal. ”
(Cristoph Heinicke)

• Orangtua yang mampu, efisien, tidak

mudah cemas, fleksibel dalam pemecahan
masalah, mampu menjaga hubungan
timbal balik yang positif terutama dengan
pasangan serta mampu mengatur otonomi
dan self esteem mereka sendiri, dianggap
lebih mampu menciptakan lingkungan
pengasuhan yang optimal.
• Pengasuhan yang optimal mencakup
responsif terhadap kebutuhan, mendorong
otonomi dan eksplorasi pengalaman
kognitif.
 Transition to parenting
• Secara spesifik, pengasuhan (parenthood)
dilihat pertama kali sebagai tahapan yang
kuat pada perkembangan wanita (e.g.,
Benedek, 1959; Chodorow, 1978; Deutsch,
1945)
• Lalu secara general baru meluas pada laki-laki
dan perempuan (Anthony and Benedek,
1970; cf. Group for the Advancement of
Psychiatry, 1975).
• Cara orang dewasa untuk mengendalikan
dunia baik secara sadar maupun tidak sadar
akan berubah seiring perubahan mereka
menjadi orangtua, seringkali mengarahkan
mereka untuk menghidupkan kembali
kerapuhan psikologis mereka sendiri melalui
anak-anak mereka
 Parental Development
• Masalah umum yang terjadi dalam tahapan
perkembangan pengasuhan menurut
Benedek (Demick, 2002) :
1) stage one, from conception to the child’s
entry into school, this is a period of “total
parenthood” during which parents perceive
children as completely their own
2) stage two, the point in time at which the
youngest child reaches adolescence and
parents must deal with the “empty nest”
phenomenon
3) stage three, beginning when parents become
grandparents and indulge their grandchildren
instinctively.
 Psychosocial Approach on
Parental Development

• Erikson proposed that :

(1) in stages have psychosocial
aspects, which involve major
social conflicts that the individual
must resolve at each stage (e.g.,
basic trust versus mistrust,
autonomy versus shame and
doubt, and initiative versus guilt
 Psychosocial Approach on
Parental Development

Erikson proposed that :

(2) Social development continues
postadolescence (even if
intellectual development does not)
and leads to consideration of three
additional developmental stages
(and social conflicts) :
• young adulthood (intimacy versus
isolation)
• adulthood (generativity versus
stagnation)
• maturity (integrity versus despair)
 Psychosocial Approach on
Parental Development

Menurut Erikson inti dari

pendekatan psikososial terhadap
perkembangan pengasuhan :
• investing in their children’s lives,
sharing their life experiences, and
guiding and teaching them.
• Few life experiences provide as
much opportunity to care for
others, to realize our “need to be
needed,” and to exercise our
innate wish to teach as
parenthood.
Cognitive Approach (Stages) on
Parental Development

Stated simply, Sameroff (1975a,

1975b, 1975c) and Sameroff and
Feil (1985) ordered parents’ :
• conceptions of their children’s
development into four stages,
corresponding to Piaget’s four
stages of
• the child’s intellectual development,
namely, symbiotic (sensorimotor),
categorical (preoperational),
• compensating (concrete
operational), and perspectivistic
(formal operational).
 Stages on Parental
Development
Tahapan “parental development” menurut
Newberger (Demick, 2002) :

(1)Egoistic orientation.
Here, a parent is self-focused (considering only
her or his own interests and needs) and perceives
the child merely as a projection of her or his own
experience (e.g., in terms of the effect of the
child on the parent).
(2) Conventional orientation.
At this level, a parent understands her or his child
in terms of externally derived definitions and
explanations of children (e.g., culture, tradition,
“authority,” age related norms for children’s
development). Parenting is perceived as
reasoning about such issues as the most correct
way to, for example, toilet train or discipline
children.
 Stages on Parental
Development
(3) Subjective–individualistic orientation.
Here, a parent views her or his child as a unique
individual who (differing from external definitions
such as those embodied in norms) may now
instead be understood through the parent–child
relationship itself. Parents at this level broaden
their reasoning about parenting and organize it
instead around identifying and responding to the
needs of this particular child.
(4) Analytic–systems orientation.
Here, a parent understands both herself or
himself and her or his child as complex and
changing psychological self-systems, which are
embedded within interacting mutual systems
that influence family, community, and global
relations. The parent sees both her or his own
and her or his child’s development through the
ongoing process of parenting (in which the
parent finds ways to balance her or his own
needs as well those of her or his child).
 Stages on Parental
Development
Levinson (Demick, 2002) a series of six
stages (with relevant developmental
tasks for parents):

(1)Image-making stage.
Here, she has characterized the image-
making stage (pregnancy until birth) as
the time “when prospective parents
begin to cull through, to form, and to
re-form images of what’s to come, of
birth and parenthood”. Parental tasks,
for example, involve the parent
preparing for a change in role, forming
feelings for the baby, “reconciling the
image of the child with the actual
child” , and preparing for a change in
other important adult relationships.
 Stages on Parental
Development
(2) Nurturing stage.
From birth until the child is approximately 2
years of age (when the child begins to say
“no”), parents may experience a conflict
between earlier expectations of what the
child might be like and the actuality of
parenthood. The major task of this stage is
“becoming attached to the baby. . . . It took
a couple of weeks until it wasn’t like having
an object in our home” . In contrast to the
initial state of symbiosis between mother
and child, attachment “implies both
emotional and physical separateness and
connectedness” . Here, parents assess their
priorities, figuring out how much time they
should devote to the baby and how much
to other aspects of their lives.
 Stages on Parental
Development
(3) Authority stage.
The central task of the authority stage
(when the child is 2 to 5 years-old)
concerns how parents handle “power,”
that is, how they accept the
responsibility, communicate effectively,
select and enforce limits, decide on how
much to shield and protect the child,
cope with conflicts with the child, and
handle or avoid battles of the will. The
authority issue is not restricted to
children, however, but is also concerned
with working out authority relationships
with others (who deal with the child),
including the other parent,
grandparents, babysitters, teachers,
neighbors, and the like.
 Stages on Parental
Development

(4) Interpretive stage.

Here (when the child is 5 to 12
years-old) for parents “the major
task is to interpret the world to their
children, and that entails not only
interpreting themselves to their
children and interpreting and
developing their children’s self
concepts, but also answering their
questions, providing them access to
the skills and information they need,
and helping them form values” .
 Stages on Parental
Development

(5) Interdependent stage.

As the child reaches adolescence,
the parent is faced with and must
interact with a “new” child. All
aspects of the prior relationship
(e.g., communication) must be
renegotiated and new issues (e.g.,
sexuality) addressed.
 Stages on Parental
Development
(6) Departure stage.
As the adolescent gets older, the central task
becomes that “of accepting one’s grown child’s
separateness and individuality, while
maintaining the connection . . .” “The ‘old,’
‘original,’ family has changed, the children have
grown, moved away, and the parents’ roles
have changed, and most parents search for
new ways to say they are still a family” . This
stage is characterized by evaluations. “Parents
evaluate their images of departure, when and
how far they thought their child would go.
They evaluate whether they’ve achieved the
parent/grown
• child relationship they wanted as well as taking
stock of their overall successes and failures” .